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=== "That was sexist, and that is not acceptable here." === |
=== "That was sexist, and that is not acceptable here." === |
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| − | If you are in a position of power, such as a boss or community leader, you can create, point to or enforce boundaries in response to an incident. |
+ | If you are in a position of power, such as a boss or community leader, you can create, point to or enforce boundaries in response to an incident. Best of all options, as it leaves no room for interpretation but at the same time isn't rude, self-righteous or overly blunt. |
Revision as of 11:29, 31 July 2012
Feminists and allies may want to arm themselves with good sexism comebacks in advance, particularly in person.
Note that this page is not a guarantee! These comebacks may not work. Or in a particular situation they might turn into Bad sexism comebacks. This stuff is hard, no promises can be made.
Characteristics of good comebacks.
They are simple. Very complex jokes or shaming tactics are hard to remember and they run a high chance of playing into homophobia or other gender problems, see bad sexism comebacks.
They are short. You usually cannot convert someone to feminism in a single call-out. There is seldom much point in a long argument after a sexist comment. Often, all you can do is disapprove.
Prototype Comebacks
"I don't think that sounds as funny as you want it to sound."
Preemptively destroys "but everyone thinks this is funny". Group dynamics can still cause the rest of the group to laugh even after you've said something along these lines.
"We're done."
End the line of discussion. May cause conversation participants to question where they crossed a line.
"Who let you think it would be okay to say something like that?"
Preemptively quashes "I was only joking". It doesn't, though "I was only joking" will sound more apologetic if you make it clear you were not amused.
"Wow, women X's are so rare/unusual": reply, "That's why it's so important that I exist"
Shift the dialogue from an othering to recognition. Certainly an option, if an extremely obvious one to anyone with even a hint of social clout and an extremely self-centered reply. It might make you a better feminist (I don't know) but it *will* make you a worse human being.
alternative: "Wow, women X's are so rare/unusual": reply, "Would you rather have a male for this? Do you also have any racial or religious preferences?"
deflection, though this may be contentious in its use.
"Excuse me?" / "I'm sorry, I don't quite understand what you're trying to say. Could you state it more plainly?"
Chime in. Cause the speaker to reflect. Be prepared to follow up.
"It sounds like you are implying <sexist thing>. I'm sure you don't really think that. <change subject>"
Exerts some social pressure against stating <sexist thing>.
"That was sexist."
Just saying it out loud is a good comeback. Also a mood-killer.
"That was sexist, and that is not acceptable here."
If you are in a position of power, such as a boss or community leader, you can create, point to or enforce boundaries in response to an incident. Best of all options, as it leaves no room for interpretation but at the same time isn't rude, self-righteous or overly blunt.